Thursday, February 16, 2012

What These Bitches Want From a Nigga? (What @itsmscoco2u says)


Well I guess that depends on who you ask. As for me it depends on which day you ask me. I will admit to being one of those Women who really doesn’t know what she wants. I like to attribute my indecisiveness to being a Gemini. Helps me feel better about it. Part of me wants a Rich man with a Big Penis and a Monster tongue to travel around the world with Eating, Drinking, watching strippers and having sweaty sex in wild places. I want him to blow my mind, body and soul. I want to fuck on the beach, dine at the RITZ and bathe in Champagne. I want someone who can take me places even my imagination hasn’t dreamed up yet. Someone who brings all the naughty out of me. Rock my world….  Then take his ass right back home until I summon his presence again.

Another part of me wants a strong, loving, dependable Southern Man to come home to everyday. I want a man who makes me feel secure in giving all my love only to him. A man who takes out the garbage and mows the lawn on the little piece of property we saved up to buy. A man who’s idea of a night out consist of Drinking with his friends and playing poker. A man who forgets occasionally that he still has to date me, but never forgets my birthday or our anniversary. A man who loves his Mama and fears God. I want a Man who calls me on my bullshit and caresses away my pain. I want to come home to a man who knows how to fix the kitchen sink and is willing to clean out the gutters. A man who I can put a 3 piece suit on and the outside world would never guess his past. A man willing to love me despite mine…

So… to answer the Trillion Dollar question: What these Bitches want from a Nigga?

EVERYTHING!

brought to you by @itsmscoco2u 

What These Bitches Want From A Nigga? (what @RODRIGUEZ_TGC says)


The Trillion Dollar Question: 







"What these bitches want from a nigga?"

Answer: 

1. Money 2.Swag  3.Good Sex

End of article. 

It's that simple if your just strictly looking for a good time, but once you step into the relationship arena, oh boy things get a lot more complicated....things like love, understanding, commitment, caring all start coming into place, but don't think you can leave those other three points alone 1. Money 2. Swag 3. and good sex must remain. So how do you balance all of these without letting your ego get out of control, or on other side not go crazy? IDK ask Obama.  
My theory for guys is do not get into a relationship unless your money is right, cuz she can LOVE you, but if your money aint right, just LOVE is not going to make her stick around, it has to be a combination of both plus you have to be interesting aka swag. There are a lot more factors that are involved but I would need a book to write about those in depth.  If I'm wrong ladies please correct me.

BROUGHT TO YOU BUY @RODRIGUEZ_TGC

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Waking at the Westin


*Stretches and yawns* I begin to adjust my eyes to the darkness. The first thing I realize… I have clearly drunk a lot the previous night. Wait is it morning? My vision begins to clear. By the looks of this room… I am definitely at the Westin. I’d recognize this room décor in the dark. Well this is either a good sign or a really bad sign. Waking up in a strange hotel? But hey…. At least it’s the Westin right? Am I alone? A voice from behind me whispers “Are you awake Baby?” Nope, clearly not alone.  I take a deep breath and roll over. Do my eyes deceive me? Am I lying next to the MAN himself? Visions of the previous night begin to hit me like a raging flood.

            A simple business conversation turns into “let’s go to happy hour”. That Happy Hour turns into “Go Home and get dressed, I’ll have my driver wait for you and bring you to the club” A few drinks in the club, relaxing in VIP. He’s no major clubber; he’d rather drink and watch everyone else act a fool. I’m with that plan. We attempt small talk over loud obnoxious music. This is no upscale lounge, we are in Hood City. Nevertheless we are determined to enjoy ourselves. And like a flash of lightning I see a shiny stripper pole beckoning my attention from my right peripheral. The desperate and disillusioned women in this club begin to shake and gyrate in hopes of getting… phone bill money… I suppose. Before I know it, I’m given a $100 bill and instructed to turn it into 100 singles. I am much obliged. I myself am quite a big fan of Women taking off their clothes for money and I have no problem helping “Chocolate Thunder” pay her metro bill. After visiting 4 different Bar Tenders I finally have made this 1 bill into 100 bills. I stuff the money into my bosom as make my way through the thickness of the crowd back to the safety of VIP.  After consuming one more drink he grabs my hand, leads me through what feels like hell for broke people and up to the stage where the stripper pole awaits our 1’s. One hand on my waist… the other continuing to hand me one dollar bills to rub up and down “Chocolate Thunder’s” ass. Keep in mind this is NOT A STRIP CLUB. But hey what do you expect when you have a stripper pole, Hennessy, Waka Flaka Music and a bunch of Horny men drunk and willing to spend all the little money they worked so hard for 2 weeks to get? The crowd is in an uproar. They are elated to see this little Woman (me) making it rain on the biggest ass any of them have probably ever seen in real life. A few of them get out of control and begin to grope MY ass…. Now it’s time TO GO!

We spend some time cuddled in a corner and finally decide leave. He beckons the driver and informs him it’s time to go. I’m instructed to find a hotel. *Siri, find the nearest Westin* 

                           ************ INSERT MEMORY LOSS*************
Yes! It is the MAN that I have awakened to. I peek under the covers. Not naked…. But definitely NOT full dressed. He wraps his arms around me and as I look down I spy a sparkle . I'm reminded of what I already surmised in the back of my mind. We talk about business for a while then its gets personal. Something is genuine in his admissions of his inability to resist me .  After further conversation it is made clear that we did NOT enter into horizontal polka during the night. The relief I felt is indescribable.